Hate It.

Sometimes... i really do hate life.
There are things I wish I haven't done.
And things I wish I don't do.
And just things in general.
I hate how I learned to play the piano. Even after quitting, my dad still forces me to practice so that the money they put into my piano lessons haven't gone to waste. I hate how I accepted to try and play as an accompanist for my dad's friend for 24hour worship. Because I accepted to try, my dad is always on my tail, asking me to practice those songs each day, asking whether i know how to play them and telling me how i'm not playing fast enough for the songs and how i need to practice them more and how i need to learn the chords and everything. I hate how because I don't practice piano, my parents think I actually don't like music and said they were going to tell my music teacher at school that i don't practice piano. Seriously, piano is not the only instrument that has to do with music. Get it screwed it your head properly.
I hate how even though I've followed my parents around this winter holiday, they're still complaining that I'm always on the computer and how I took their laptop because my computer got messed up.
I hate how my dad tells me I'm the same as "him". I can honestly tell you, just because I'm a BIT like my him, doesn't mean i AM him. Okay? I wash the dishes when you tell me to, I don't argue with you while calling you insulting things, I vacuum the carpet when i'm told, sweep the floor, I even shovel the snow and clean the bathroom (before he took over it) when you tell me to. My life isn't always spent in front of the screen of my computer like him okay? I actually do those. He doesn't. I don't even understand why he gets allowances and i don't. He doesn't do anything at all yet he gets $50 a month? Tch.
I hate being compared to friends or people in general. The End. Oh sure, go compare me with someone else. Oh sure, yell at me when I compare myself with someone else because they're not your "child".
Hate it. Yeah sure, hate's a strong word. Haven't used that word in a while. But you know what... life's messed up enough to use it right now.
Hate how i feel like i don't belong here or anywhere. The love? it comes.. and goes. This lonely world... can't trust anyone.
Hate it... just let me hate it for now... just for now...
i'll go back to how i am later... loving everything again.
but just for now... let me drown... in my misery.